I AM SORRY, I WAS WRONG, I DON'T KNOW, I NEED HELP

The title is a quote from a Louise Penny novel and she entitles it as "the four sayings that lead to wisdom." She includes this in her book Kingdom of the Blind as something that her main character Inspector Gamache learned when he was young. Louise Penny is a Canadian mystery writer who has won a number of awards for her writing and she frequently includes quotes such as the above in her novels.

The simplicity of the quote from Ms. Penny struck me and the importance of what I feel it communicates...taking responsibility for oneself. In my work with my patients it seems clear that taking responsibility for oneself is necessary for a happy and fulfilled life. I have found that to do this we need to be self-aware and allow for self-accceptance and self-appreciation. These qualities seem to help us to be responsible for ourselves. As one 23 year old woman once told me "of course I will take responsibility for that as it is about me and I am the only one who is me." I was thinking "easier said than done" but then as I thought about it I realized that once it is said, it is easier to do as one has the awareness that it up to them and this can lead to responsible action. 

So, how do we take responsibility for ourselves? I believe that it is by listening to others, not reacting to them, and not taking anything personally. This makes it easier to listen to ourselves as we are not distracted by reacting to others and feeling that they are responsible for what we do. Listening without our personal reactions allows us to feel closer to others [and they are more likely to feel understood by us] and also realize that we do not need to react to others but only need to be aware of what we are doing and take responsibility for our actions.

Taking responsibiity for our actions by saying: I am sorry, I was wrong, I don't know, I need help. You might be amazed at what happens if you say these things instead of worrying about what might happen, predicting negative things happening, blaming others for problems in your life and for your feeling miserable.

What do you think?