WE SHALL ALL, IN THE END, BE LED TO WHERE "WE BELONG. WE SHALL ALL, IN THE END, FIND OUR WAY HOME"

The above is from The Beatryce Prophecy by Kate DiCamillo. It is a book about faith in oneself [Beatryce in herself] and this allows you to trust and have faith in others to help you. It is about being brave [doing what we know is right] so that we do not turn away from what is right for us to do and brave to go forward and brave to love ourselves and others. So, knowing and believing in ourselves leads to trust in ourselves and others, and this leads to having faith in others and this leads to love. Kate DiCamillo in talking about her books says that it is our job to love the world. So, this clarifies that "this leads to love" written above, means to love the world. 

Is this possible? Yes, it is. Will this help us to not worry and to not hate others but actually care about them? Yes, it will. Is it that simple? Yes, it is. It appears that it is up to us to choose to know ourselves and take responsibility of ourselves. No one can be responsible for us, it is actually impossible. However, it is fairly easy to delegate responsibility for ourselves to others. It would seem that we do this because it temporarily reduces our anxiety about the future and yet it make it certain that we will continue to be anxious. Anxiety will not stop anxiety and no one else can make us happy.

So, is it really up to us? Yes, it is. So, what does this have to do with the quote noted in the title to this blog? Maybe it means that since it is impossible to delegate responsibility for ourselves to others, we will all choose to know ourselves and this will then lead us to where we belong and to home. 

IT IS SO SAD...THAT WE ARE SO SEPARATED FROM EACH OTHER

Recently I have been having moments of intense sadness that I realized were connected to hearing about conflicts between people that ends up reinforcing them being separate and even feeling against each other. Sad, because it is sad when people feel separated from each other. It does not need to be this way. 

I believe that this separateness is fueled by fear of not having enough as if everything that we need is in limited supply and if others have things we will not have enough. This is not true but if someone believes this then they will be anxious and see others as taking from them. This will inevitably separate these people from others and result in loneliness. 

We can help ourselves by refusing to judge others and listening to others without our own reactions. This will help us to feel and be connected to others and feel less alone. It really willl.

ARE WE A SOCIETY OF PICKPOCKETS?

The title refers to a quote from Thomas Jefferson about people who do not take responsibility for themselves and are thus like pick pockets are robbing others. The quote is referring to freedom of religion as an example of something that does not injure anyone when someone expresses their religious preference. "It neither picks your pocket nor breaks your leg." according to Jefferson. Thus, it is not the business of government to get involved as the government's role is to get involved only if someone does things that are injurious to others. Jefferson also concludes that freedom must be balanced by responsibility to others or it is not freedom but a cheapened version of the golden rule, namely "I can do what I wish and I don't care about anyone else." 

So, to be free we must be responsible for ourselves and responsible for what we do to others. Is this being responsible to others achieved by taking responsibility for ourselves and what we do? How does this influence other people? If you are responsible for yourself and your actions then you are aware of how you influence others and how what you do impacts others. Your being responsible will not allow you to hurt others as hurting others is being irresponsible to others and to yourself. How does one know that they are hurting others? We humans know this and if we don't then we are denying that fact and denial takes a lot of brain energy and that is exhausting. If groups of people collectively deny that they are hurting others then this can be more easily maintained for awhile but it is still draining and leaves the person feeling isolated and afraid. Why does not being responsible for ourselves lead to isolation and fear. Well, when we are not responsible for ourselves we put that resonsibility onto others. This alienates us from others and therefore isolates us. It also makes us afraid of others whom we judge as being against us.

What do you think?

HOPE IS A GOOD THING, MAYBE THE BEST OF THINGS AND NO GOOD THING EVER DIES

The above is from the movie "Shaw Shank Redemption" in a letter written by Andy to Red encouraging Red to not give up and to join Andy after Red is paroled. And Red does just that. So, is that statement true. Is hope the best of things and will it never die? How is that possible?

Is hope a basic aspect of being human? Will it live on in humans and never die? Fear makes it hard to feel hope. Fear is the enemy of hope and as Stephen King has been quoted as saying: "Fear can hold you prisoner. Hope can set you free." It does seem that fear can hold us prisoner as we are constantly controlled by our fears and are also at the mercy of our fears and at the mercy of people who fuel our fears in an effort to keep us afraid and immobilized so that we can be manipulated. This is a very sad way to live and will keep us prisoner until we can turn away from fear and embrace hope. 

If we are brave enough to see ourselves clearly and recognize that we do not need to be afraid and see others as working against us, then we can choose to begin to let go of our fears and begin to feel hope for ourselves and for the world around us. 

What do you think?

"I WAS THERE I REMEMBER IT ALL TO WELL"

"I was there I remember it all too well" is a lyric from a Taylor Swift song "All Too Well" that seems to validate what she experienced in a relationship...does she need to validate herself? I don't believe that anyone needs to validate themselves through some one else. So why do we do this? What do we get from this? Security? But really it is a false sense of security. If we have to reassure ourselves about ourselves by challenging someone else's response then we are allowing that other person to challenge our identity enough to require our response. No one has that power over us unless we give it to them. You can see what can happen as if we give others this power,  we will then be constantly defending ourselves from their statements, lies or rumors about us. We will invite being bullied as we respond to the bully as if what they say warrents a response. It does not...ever. However, it is hard not to respond, but after we do, we can help ourselves move past responding by learning to trust our awareness of ourselves and will be less likely to let ourselves be fooled by someone else's insecurity that they are trying to make be ours. This may be what Taylor Swift is saying in this song.

So what are we supposed to do? Listen to others, while not reacting to them? Ignore them if listening to them is not possible at this time? Say, "is that so," if we feel that we must say something or if you are actually listening without your personal reaction to what you are hearing, then if you need to say anything your brain will provide this for you. Yes to all of those suggestions. If you choose to do these things you will have a deserved increase in self-confidence and a more fulfilled life. Try it and see what happens.